Womens Relationship Advice

Question: I am currently drawn to someone I have a connection with and that I feel has the same feelings. Trouble is, it's very difficult because of who he is and the obstacles involved, such as distance and not being able to spend time with him alone. Am I just "going down the garden path" or is there some credence to this relationship?

Click to Listen (Time: 5 minutes, 13 seconds)

Answer: Thank you for your question, dear one. Alana feels that you are learning much about your emotions, about love, about your heart, and about what pleases you. Also, about the qualities that exist within you that you would like mirrored back to you. It feels that this person is a mirror for you to see the beauty within you. Yet, they are someone that you only get to view partially. What I mean by this is they are someone who can only mirror back to you parts of yourself, and with a quality of safety. Since your life conditions are somewhat difficult now, you are only mirrored back yourself in gentle ways.

Perhaps what would be really exciting for you would be to go within yourself and ask a series of questions about what you feel a significant relationship would be like. You could ask questions like these:

-- What do I feel a significant relationship could bring to me?

-- What do I feel I could bring to a significant relationship?

Thinking in this way puts the advice and power of creating the relationship within you. This will give you more information and assist you in realizing those qualities for which you are looking outside of yourself. As you become clearer about what a relationship has in store for you, and become clearer about what you want, you will receive the answer in how to pursue this person. Engaging in this questioning process will even give you more understanding, more confidence, and a greater sense of knowledge in how to take the next step.

Continue to look within yourself for answers. From there, the answers will help you know how and when to communicate your thoughts in deeper ways. It will tell you if you are ready to take a risk. Recognize that love is always there for you. The willingness to allow love to come in, the more that you open up to love--and that includes loving yourself--the more love can come into you from outer forms.

These are some practical steps to help you move toward clarity. I feel they will give you insight in how to pursue this situation. You can find insight about whether the obstacles that appear in the outer world are really about the outer world, or if they have more to do with you. You are on the right track because you are opening up to more love.

Thank you, dear one. Alana appreciates your question very much. Do know that Alana is always available to be within your heart as well.

-- Alana

 

 

Bookmark and Share


What do you think? Please enter your comments below.


Comments

 

 
By Katie
2009-12-01 22:02:56
 

So my boyfriend has befriended a girl for the first time in forever. She's younger than he is, but I think she's prettier than me, which feeds my insecurity issues. Anyway he went a little out of character and hugged her and commented on her Facebook status's, also one if his friends says he flirts with her. But my boyfriend is a flirty person so that doesn't really bother me. It's the out of character stuff that does. He only talks to her during one class and every other day at lunch, with a bunch of other people; he's never talked to her outside of school. We talked about it and he offered to stop talking to her. But I wouldn't let him because he said he just wanted to be her friend. He's a good guy and he spends every free second he has talking and being with me. Currently I have told him he can't talk to her. I just want to know if i really have something to worry about or it's just my jealousy taking over? And should I let him keep talking to her? Thank you so much for your answer.

 
By J.B.
2010-06-15 19:06:39
 

I think the man I was involved with is "emotionally unavailable." He has had two failed marriages and the second wife hung herself. He is free now, but when we were together the time was great, but the follow through of calling etc. was very inconsistent. It seemed as if when we got very close, he then got distant. And then I was the one making all the calls. He told me "I don't call people, they call me," and "this works you call me, I call you." I have never experienced anything like this. The most he revealed to me was he had deep feelings for me. This "affair" went on and off for two years. I saw him recently several times and he said his boys don't want him to date. I am contemplating divorce and then we kissed and he told me I was beautiful and that he had human needs and desires, but maybe in time he will date. I just found out he took a young girl out that was thirteen years younger. Will this man always be emotionally unavailable. I know for a fact he neglected both of his wives. I feel so rejected, but maybe he truly has these intimacy issues.

Enter Your Comment or Question:


Name: (required)

E-mail: (required)

Security Code: (required)

Your e-mail address will not be displayed and will remain confidential.


 

Security Code to enter
Security Image

Please enter your comment or question below:

characters left    

By commenting here you grant askAlana.com a perpetual license to reproduce your words and submitted name/web site in attribution.

 

Page Protected by Copyscape - Do Not Copy  |  askAlana.com is © HeartCore Corporation 1998-2010