Tag Archives: self-trust

Dealing with Self Judgment? A Meditation for Moving Into a Resourceful and Non Judgmental State

We are often told it is not good to judge others.

The guilt or shame we feel when we do can turn into negative self judgment.

We can get caught in a mental loop where we begin judging our judgments.

This state can create an emotional dam causing mental reactions that keeps us from accessing a creative state of authenticity where we have access to our inner wisdom and guidance.

The following self guided meditation can be read aloud and recorded. Be sure to include pauses between the paragraphs for reflection. Use The Heart Meditation as a guided meditation to help create a healthy emotional state where judgment transforms into a much more creative awareness: discernment.

Heart Meditation

Heart MeditationLay down or sit quietly with your hands on your heart.

Allow whatever feelings you have to rise to fuller consciousness.

Whatever your feelings are, allow yourself to have them and to just be with them.

Allow whatever is present to be present.

Take a few moments to feel them fully and allow your feelings and emotions to rise to the surface.

As you move into this feeling state remind yourself you are safe to feel what is within you, for what is within you is there to guide you. Your feelings are always valid. Your feelings hold keys to open doors that will free you from fear and self-limitation.

Connect with Your Breath

Windy FieldLike the wind blows across an open meadow and bends the seeding tassels of grass, take a moment to connect with the movement of your breath.

Now, as you inhale, allow your breath to open and feel it move deeper and deeper within your body.

As you inhale deeper with each breathe imagine you are also breathing in a beautiful radiating light.

Know this comforting light holds useful information that you will soon realize along with the essence of compassion.

Compassion for all that you are currently feeling and have experienced in the past.

Breathe in Light and Information

Radiant LightThis benevolent and comforting light is relaxing to your emotions. As you gently and deeply breathe in light and compassion you are beginning to feel a sense of tolerance and deep relaxation.

This state is connecting with your innate senses and your intuition. You are simply gaining greater clarity as this light filled information guides you to a practice of self-care.

Now you are able to remember multiple ways to create and invite self-love. You remember what it is like to nurture and love yourself just as you would any loyal and trusted friend.

The safety you feel is creating a space that allows old limiting thoughts or beliefs to float freely away from your essence…floating and rising into the distance.

Take a moment now to sense a growing new found freedom that can change your reality for the better.

Find a Magical Key

A Key to WisdomThis freedom has the ability to allow judgments to transform into discernments. Any reactions to the judgments you have held onto in the past are presenting keys that unlock a door where discernments are easily realized.

Simple ways to self nurture that help you create life with ease and magic easily emerge from your inner light.

With your breathe, you inhale a deep sense of self-love and any left over limiting judgments easily release from your physical body.

  • You easily release fears from the past.
  • Your easily let go of any fear of the future.
  • Fear you have held onto for lifetimes no longer makes sense to hold and dissipates until it is gone.

Guided by light, you now know all fear that you have held and stored has gently left and moved beyond your field creating space for new realizations.

You are now able to discern your deep innate inner needs and the values you hold dear to your heart.

Visit A Moment in Time

A moment in timeIn the minutes, hours, and days ahead the essence of your purpose will shine brighter.

Imagine a moment in time where you are free to do whatever you please while trusting the guidance of your  inner self. In this moment you realize your purpose both in your inner and outer world.

It is delightful to know that whatever excites you and allows you to thrive is possible.

Take a few moments and feel and sense what you might do, how you might be, and what you may have as you fully express authenticity and divine purpose.

Notice how all of your senses are involved. One by one your senses easily bring an image to focus that reveals your full, sparkling, light-filled essence. This is an aspect of who you really are!

Now trust that at any given future moment you can express from this newly realized light filled essence.

Spend time and look at yourself. Imagine your light filled essence as it speaks to you in a clear voice. What might it say? What words might flow from your true love-filled self.

Notice the words and how they guide you to a deep understanding of your unique individuality, your loving purpose, and why you choose to be in this world at this time in your life.

Experience Clarity

Creating ClarityA sense of clarity allows you to learn from situations you have experienced in this life. You can easily find additional keys as you need them to open any closed doors that appear in your future. Whenever a door appears that is closed as you open it you are able to connect with your personal power. Your keys always help you open doors to abundance, and help you realize new and powerful possibilities.

Now it is time to draw all you have realized, discovered, and remembered while on this journey into your heart. You know you can trust your mind’s ability to grasp this information and use it in the most useful ways.

This heart and mind wisdom will always instinctively know how to balance and remain fully accessible. You’re a beautiful blend of your higher and true self and the person you feel yourself to be.

Pause for a moment or two. Allow your heart to recognize the desire of your mind that wants to help you learn and discover what is most important.

Take another moment or two and pause again. Witness as your mind realizes the wisdom of your heart and its ability to guide you to what you value most…what is most dear to your authentic nature.

Embrace Heart and Mind Harmony

Moving into the heartNow take another moment to experience again your heart and mind in harmony.

As you inhale and exhale your breathe gently assists you to awaken present and clear minded from this compassionate and light filled state.  You awaken refreshed and alert, ready to continue your day.

It is comforting to know at any time you wish your body and senses will lovingly help you remember the knowledge gained during this state of expanded awareness.

Now, slowly count from five to one.

Five: You feel the connection to your body and the room where you are laying of sitting.

Four: The outside world is more apparent as your attention moves to your surroundings.

Three: You gently open your eyes and look around you.

Two: With mental clarity, trust, and courage you are now able to discern what is your highest and best choice in any given moment.

One: You are now fully awake, aware, and ready to go about your day with clarity, peace of mind, and a happy heart.


You may also enjoy reading Alana’s answers to questions others have about self judgment and judging others.

To learn more about heart mind balance, visit > Explore Alana’s Answers on the Power of Discernment

Healing From the Influence of Negative People

Question for Alana: Hi Alana, I’ve always been aware of spirit in my life and at one point was very well attuned to my guides and was able to communicate freely.

Unfortunately I came across a very negative person who thought that what I was doing was “wrong” and disapproved of this path.

This person was in a position of great authority over me and sadly was a big influence on me, and I agreed to stop. I rejected the gifts that I had, refused to communicate with my guides and cut off from this side of who I was.

Finally, I broke free from this person and began a long process of healing that had taken many years. I feel drawn to returning to what I had before but don’t seem to be able to do this anymore.

I am so sorry and ashamed of rejecting the gifts, and of rejecting my wonderful guide, and I don’t know how to tune myself in any more, and don’t know how to trust myself.

Do you have any advice or guidance? I found your website very helpful.

blue flowerAlana’s Answer: Greetings Dear One, thank you so much for your heart felt message.

Lessons in life often come to us through the experiences of contrast.

There are many gems within your message that will unfold. They will offer you a deepening of your internal connection to your expanded nature and your spiritual self. Let’s take a walk together so you may discover how your experiences can serve you and assist in healing your heavy heart.

When Those of Power Disapprove

Every day we experience hierarchy in some fashion. Whether it is a boss at one’s place of employment, or a teacher at school, a religious figurehead, or even a family member. In some cultures there are cast systems, and in others we are taught that if we put our needs first we are selfish.  So how is it we give other’s power over us? Most would say it is woven into the fabric of our cultures; or authority has to be present to keep some type of order.

That is all fine and good, but the key to recognize is that when we view each other as separate we then really lose our sense of self. (seems contradictory, doesn’t it?) When we can heal this sense of separation we can respect others and in turn remain clear of our own true power center, which is our connection with heart, grace, and the infinite wisdom that lies within the core we all share. We we understand this,  separation of self dissolves and a sense of powerlessness goes with it.

The process of recognizing who we truly are is often a remembrance that resurfaces after we forget. If we hold ourselves with the same type of judgement that we felt we received from those we once thought had greater powers than we did then we are just mirroring back to us the same dynamic and story. So it is so very important to release shame and guilt and grasp that a disconnection from our power may just be the necessary fuel for our eternal being to powerfully recognize our authentic and vital nature.

How Do I Learn To Trust

yellow flowerLearning to trust is a natural instinct when we learn how to sharpen our senses. I am not just talking about our five senses, but our extended senses as well that reach into the non visible aspects of our being. Trust comes from the reconnection to our power center which can easily be remembered through conscious practice.

Recognize doubt can be a tool to help us learn how to trust, for doubt brings with it questions so we may learn to listen.

Most people have at least one sense that is more predominate. So this is the place to begin listening. For example, the gut level feeling we get when we know we should turn right or left when we come to a stop sign and are lost. Or the feeling we get when we know someone wants to hear from us. Learning to trust again starts with listening to whatever sense one feels is the most predominate and honoring the message we receive. Building trust comes through exercising our intuition. Then what follows is personal transformation as we become clearer channels for our values, needs, and authentic natures that wish to guide us.

If Something Is Done Once By Only One Person It Can Be Done Again

When we feel like we have lost a thing, a presence, or a connection it still exists within the field of implicate order. Intention is a powerful resource that shapes matter and presents itself as patterns of thought, expression, and even material manifestations. The first step to take to rekindle your connection with your guides is to ask for it to be so. Then expect to receive and look for subtle signs. Then build on those subtle signs and ask that the connection become more clear and essential. Here is a beautiful mantra!

Divine Love, Light, and Energy, flow through me and bring forth that which is essential for the highest good of all.

A beautiful mantra such as this embraces connection while also staying focused and free from distraction. This mantra embraces the wisdom of all and what is truly divine. Expecting to receive is a wonderful message to give the universe for it reinforces the natural flow of giving and receiving. It offers a consciousness path to find what may have not been obvious to one’s previous perceptions.

Woven in words such as this are also sparks of remembrance. When we point our attention to the home within our hearts we can recognize we have always been full even when our minds have been distracted. So now you can see that the experience you had really can serve as a gift. If your intuitive connection was strong, the veil can be lifted again. Just practice, be patient, and set aside any self judgment because the big picture is always there and always will be.

Alana with the help of Kirk and Sandy has created a beautiful intuition course that will help you reawaken your connection.

It is free to all, click > Developing Your Intuition Ebook

Developing Your Intuition – Learn How to Balance Your Mind & Heart

Here’s a question we received regarding our intuition training course that helps with developing intuition.

Kirk VandenBerghe provides insight into balancing heart and mind.

We hope you enjoy this Q&A session.

Jennifer: I really need help with the “heart” aspect. My main challenge at the moment is identifying when I’m “in heart,” and knowing how to open up to my heart and its intelligence. I’ve read the six steps to intuition in your “Developing Your Intuition” eBook and have done it a few times, but I feel like I’m a bit off the planet when I do this; out of touch with reality.

Are there certain indicators that can let me know when I’m really coming from a heart space, as opposed to a head space or a “needy” space? My biggest challenge is to identify this so I can manifest what my heart really wants, not what I think I want in my head. I get so confused.

The Flower of Intuition Blooms from Fallow Ground

Kirk: I love how you phrased, “…open up to my heart and its intelligence.” Entering altered states of consciousness and the subsequent shift in really will really help.

Love your “head.” It just wants to help. When you ask a question and your mind provides an answer, just thank that aspect of your being for its contribution. Mind is used to being the provider of answers.

Love all aspects of your being that seem to be “needy.” You have needs and wants and desires. Allow them to exist. Give them space to be. (Not space to run your life…space to be.)

My suggestion is to give yourself permission to play with learning to develop your intuition. See if you can play with temporarily setting aside the important questions in life, like what your heart truly wants. Instead, begin with play and keep things fun and light.

Act “As If” You Can

Learn to run through the first five “Developing Intuition” steps quickly:

  1. Grounding
  2. Centering & Releasing
  3. Affirming
  4. Aligning
  5. Asking

Don’t worry about doing these steps perfectly. Just pretend that you can do them quickly. Act “as if” you can. After some practice doing the first five steps slowly, you’ll be able to do them in one slow, deep breath in…and out…

Then you can finish the sixth step of “receiving” as you once again breathe in…

Breathe in the answer. This is your receiving.

Here are some example areas of life where you can play:

  • When your phone rings, sense the energy and ask yourself who is calling. Your receiving (the sixth step) is what you guess as the answer. See if you can let go of having to get the “right” answer. Just enjoy noticing what you receive.
  • When you see an email message from someone, sense the energy of the message and ask what they’re writing about. Your receiving (again, the sixth step) is what you feel is the answer.

Intuition and Breathing

As Natural As Your Breath

The first four steps are about dropping down into a resourceful state of consciousness. Then your intention is engaged on the fifth step when you form your asking. Your awareness is engaged in your receiving. Asking and receiving are as natural as breathing in…out…and back in…

By playing with asking and receiving in areas of life that do not hold for you strong significance, you can bypass the fears of success and/or failure, along with many other beliefs about possibility, capability, deserving, meaning, etc.

Again, when your mind offers an answer, note it and express your gratitude for having a mind that is responsive. Don’t scold your mind. It’s just trying to participate and help. If you like, invite your head to join in the adventure of developing intuition.

What If My Head Just Makes It Up?

Now I will address the essence of your question by rephrasing it: How do I know if what I receive is really intuitive information from my heart or just something my head made up? My answer is that the difference is often very subtle. There is a difference, but the distinctions are often quite fine. Don’t let that discourage you. Again, see if you reframe the work of intuitive practice into play.

Start moving through the first five steps quickly…ground, center, release, affirm, align…ask…receive…

As you play, you will begin to notice how your receiving operates. For example, I have great confidence when I see an inner movie that appears a little above eye level and slightly to the left. It has a yellowish color tone (I have no clue why). Through practice (play), I’ve tested what I’ve received and have been able validate the information as accurate. What preceded this ability for me was having a lot of fun making intuitive guesses and noticing my experience.

Intuitive Development Through Play

Engage Your Five Senses (and Beyond)

My example above of seeing an inner movie is primarily visual, but any of our senses can be utilized to intuitively receive information. After you ask…sense…listen…watch…feel…even taste and smell for information.

The kinder you are to your mind and its desires—your beautiful ego—the more these energies of your being will relax and enjoy the sixth step of receiving. You can’t force your mind be quiet.

For example, if you try to shut up an inner voice you’ll probably be using an inner voice! The more you enjoy the first five steps, the quieter your mind will become. The more happy and relaxed your mind, the easier and more natural your receiving will be.

This is heart-mind balance.

Relax Into Receiving

If you like, invest time in playing each day. If you do, you will find that your “guesses” become more accurate. You will build confidence and self-trust. As you grow, you will know when to ask the “bigger” questions that you feel are more important. You’ll build confidence that when you ask…you will receive. Perhaps that’s how the universe works. You will receive. You cannot not receive.

See if you can relax about of how, when, and where you will receive. See if you can relax about what you will receive.

Drop down into your intuitive state. It’s a wonderful state in which to live in. That’s the first four steps. Then…ask (step five)…and…receive (step six)…

There you go, Jennifer. I hope you enjoy the process.

Jennifer: Thank you, Kirk! That was really helpful, and I’m excited to continue practicing and playing. I know that there’s wisdom in side of me (somewhere… 😉