Trust

I like one girl but she is ignoring me and she is my friends friend. I have proposed to her indirectly and she rejected me. Is it possible she will come back to me? What is next for me?

I live alone but I don't feel lonely I actually like it. Sometimes I feel lost and I feel alone and I wonder if I will grow old alone. I am scared of this, it's one of my fears. I don't know how to deal with it. I long for a partner in so many ways yet still missing someone though he's out of reach. We don't even talk anymore. I miss what we had. I missed the love we shared together. I wonder if I am subconsciously sabotaging my new relationships just on the basis because I still feel for another, and I know he is never coming back. It saddens me so. I have so much love to give but cannot seem to find anyone of whom I want to share it with. I have settled for 2nd best so many times and will not again but my heart is still so sad. Most people find another partner to move on but I haven't yet sometimes I wish I should have but I couldn't because I didn't want to dump my left over baggage on to someone else, it is not fair. Maybe I'm picky, getting old or whatever but I need to be sure this time because the truth is I still feel broken, and I've tried everything that I can think of so my life can move forward yet nothing seems to be working fast enough. My friends and family are limited but they are so special. All that's missing from my life is a good man. It's been two years, and I'm worthy of this. I don't want to grow old alone. So my question is will I find someone who will love me for real this time and will it be soon?

I recently have been in contact with someone who I had a crush on from twenty-two years ago. I wrote to him and he responded rather quickly. I have written back, and I am yet to get a reply. A few years ago I wrote too but never answered. But this time he did. The first time I saw him I was at at a club, I was eighteen and he was a lead singer in a band. We were never introduced, but I knew who he was. Every weekend without fail I would go to his gigs, our eyes would meet and lock but that was as far as it went. Not long after he was engaged and then he got married. I left town a year or two later and always wondered what happen to him. Twenty-two years later, he replied to me. I was Ecstatic because to me this is like a dream come true. I have thought about this person on and off for twenty years and now we are in contact. His reply was business like apart from the ending, and I answered his questions, and I feel that he may think what's the point of replying quickly or at all because we live in different states. I have some doubt because he has not responded, and I am not sure of whether it is because he is married or whether it is something else. I really want to keep in contact with this person and hope that he writes back to me soon. I am not sure what I will do if he doesn't reply. Is this person the one, I can't help to wonder what might happen between us?