Kirk: Very clear. Would you like to move to step five now?
Step Five – What Do I Truly Value in the World? and Step Six – What do I Truly Value within myself
Alana: Certainly! After you do these first four steps, we are going to get into the nitty-gritty. We’ve danced around the periphery, so now we are going to go a little deeper into our center. Now we are going to begin to ask ourselves about the nature of our values. We are going to do this in two steps. First we are going to ask “What are the things within the existence of the world that I value? Then in step six we go inward and define values relating to our personal existence. Here we will ask, “What is it that I truly value within my existence.
Kirk: When you refer to “in the world and our existence” what essentially are you meaning?
Alana: In step five we identify what see in our outer world, outside of ourselves that we value. For example: healthy water, clean air we can breathe, transportation that moves us about, people cohabitating in peace. Things like this.
Then we go inward to one’s inner self, and we ask what is within our existence that we value. First “without” and then “within.”
Kirk: Step five starts with what we value within the world, and the step six moves into what we value within ourselves.
Alana: Yes, it is much easier to go within after we go without.
Kirk: Is that because what we value externally is a mirror of what we value within?
Kirk: I imagine that in answering these questions we can learn a great deal about who we are–our authentic self.
Alana: Yes. So now we are on this wonderful journey and we begin to identify what is truly important to us. What is so very beautiful about step five and six is we are now starting to get in touch with our true self; our true nature. Now we are beginning to sense the essence of our soul.
Kirk: Wonderful. Alana, what if someone gets stuck. They might say, “I can look around the outside world and see what I like, but I am not quite sure about how to look within. What do you mean? I am not quite sure how to do that. I get kind of a blank when I go in there.”
Alana: Just begin. Just begin by saying anything that comes to your thoughts. Once you begin to create a bit of motion, then something will kick in and engage becoming co-motion. It’s just like when you want to clear your mind and you do a “stream of consciousness” writing technique where you write at least three pages of unconscious flow. When you begin, you write your stresses and your mental confusions. As you continue, you step into the vibration that is your wise self; your intuition; your clear mind. Your clear self often begins to emerge and communicate once you reach the third page of writing.
Kirk: As we do this process, we become more aware of our values, or what is important to us.
Kirk: You suggest that first people look to the outside world and once they have discovered a number of things that they like in people, places, and things in the world, then they move inward. Since it is easier to look in our outer world and then relate what we identify there to our inner world. Do you think it is a good idea in this fifth and sixth step to look back on steps two and three: “If I just didn’t have to (fill in the blank)”, or “I could be happy if (fill in the blank)”? Do you think this would actually help the process in this step? That is, are you suggesting people take a fresh look?
Alana: Yes, I feel it is a good idea to go back to steps two and three. It will help ignite this process and an individual will identify many values.
Kirk: Do you have any other encouragement about these next two steps? They seems very important.
Alana: Relating back to steps two and three can help a person identify what is important to them. If a person can fill up a page on a notebook with values, it will greatly serve them. The values can relate specifically to environment, relationships, personal goals and even the way a person likes their day to be structured. They may wish to include the types of people they like to be with as well as qualities they appreciate within others. They may also take into consideration the way they would like the world to present itself and how they want their world to look to them. So the values can pertain to both inward and outward expressions as well as finite and global.
Kirk: It also seems that our value list can highlight things that we already know and are good at. For instance, I love to facilitate people finding balance in their lives. I feel this is something I am good at. As I reflect on why I enjoy doing this work, it becomes clear to me that many of my core values are utilized as I work with people. As we do step five and six, do you think it would help to also include the things we feel we are good at?
Alana: Definitely! This clearly points to our values, which are an aspect of our authentic nature. So often people discount the things they are good at because it comes to them so easily. As we learn to surrender to what is natural for us, we uncover many innate skills and talents that are eagerly looking for ways to express in our lives. This brings us to an awareness: if everyone surrendered to what they were good at, what was natural to them, the varied expressions of each person would combine together like the pieces in a puzzle. Our world would appear very whole, rather than so fragmented. The symmetry would be exquisite.
Kirk: Thank you Alana, that gives us a clear understanding of how to work with step five and six and uncover what our authentic values are.
To view the next post in this series, click > Incorporate My Values and Let Go of Distraction